I have a confession…

I don’t care if my husband puts the toilet seat down.

I really don’t. In the grand scheme of things that I care about, that ranks really, really low. I figured that was fairly normal. I’ve heard that women get really weird about the toilet seat, but never thought it was for real…and then when we were dating, my husband left the toilet seat up in the guest bathroom in the house I shared with a roommate. She flipped out. Like legitimately got mad at him.

I couldn’t figure it out. Just put it down yourself. I feel like I don’t have any right to do less work in the bathroom than a man. Either I have to put it down or he has to lift it up. Who owns the rights to toilet leisure?

I made a similar comment to my husband’s roommate, and he just stared at me. He said he had never heard a woman say that. I especially didn’t understand why my husband or his roommate would have to put the toilet seat down in their own apartment when I was there. I certainly didn’t have bathroom rights there.

On a related note, I’ve recently realized that my husband doesn’t refill the toilet paper dispenser, and I don’t care about that either. I just put a role on that he had left on the sink, and it literally took about 3 seconds, and I was sitting down anyway.

All this weird toilet talk to say, I think people, men and women, get way too hung up on little details like this to really enjoy their relationship. You’re obviously going to be unhappy in a relationship if you’re constantly worried about whether or not you’re going to have to put a toilet seat down before doing your business.

Unfortunately, it’s really easy to get caught up in these kinds of little details until that’s all you see. A husband that doesn’t put the toilet seat down. A wife that doesn’t rinse her dishes. Once those things start taking over, it becomes hard to see all of the great stuff that your spouse does. He may not put the toilet seat down, but does that trump when he teaches your kid a new song or folds the laundry?

If you feel yourself starting to fixate on the little annoyances, widen your view and focus on the amazing things that your spouse does. In the grand scheme of things, does the toilet seat really matter?